Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Wednesday Morning Mish Mash

1.
Former CSI sex pot Khandi Alexander is having a real bitch of a time getting her Los Angeles khrib sold. The poor thing first listed her Woodshill Trail quoin-set hut (shown above) at an unimaginable $4,495,000 where is sat and sat and sat some more. First came a whopping million dollar price reduction and then the asking price was hacked to $2,995,000, just above the $2,850,000 that property records show Miss Alexander paid in January of 2006 for the 4,126 square foot house with four full floors of elevator-less living. The listing was recently marked "Looking for Backup" which would indicate that a buyer finally stepped up to take this real estate white elephant off Miss Alexander's delicate hands. But alas... that buyer seems to have evaporated like the wind and the house is back on the market and still available for someone who might enjoy spending their evenings peering and peeping through the panes of The Chateau Marmont which is located just behind the house.

2.
Academy award winning actress Angela Bassett has also been struggling to unload her Hancock Park home (shown above) for longer than Your Mama cares to remember. First listed for $5,999,000, the asking price for the 5 bedroom and 7.5 bathroom house on guard gated Fremont Place has been karate chopped all the way down to its current asking price of $3,900,000. The listing is currently marked "Looking for Backup" which indicates that the property is in escrow. Hallelujah! Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter can both rest easier now that someone has finally coughed up the cash for Miz Bassett's private gym, hair salon, guest house and European style back yard.

3.
Some time ago boob tube scribe and producer Mark Brazill (That 70s Show, 3rd Rock From the Sun) bought a big house on Aberdeen Road in Los Feliz from fashionista music icon Gwen Stefani and her husband Gavin Rossdale. Property records show the notoriously bombastic Mister Brazill paid $4,795,000 for the 5 bedroom and 4 bathroom Mediterranean manse (shown above). Rumors swirled that Mister Brazill only bought the house to thwart a purchase by an industry rival, but that's just rumor and gossip that Your Mama knows nuthin' about so don't any of you children go repeating that like it's gospel 'cause it ain't.

Whatever the reason for the purchase, Mister Brazill clearly had no interest in keeping the casa and quickly flipped it back on the market with an asking price of $4,885,000. After many months of sitting around without a buyer, the price was given a serious karate chopped all the way down to $3,995,000, a figure which Your Mama's bejeweled abacus indicates will result in a teeth chattering financial loss for Mister Brazill.

This is not the first time that Mister Brazill will have to accept considerably less than he wanted for a high priced house. Property records show that in February of 2008 he sold a house in Toluca Lake for $2,850,000 which had earlier been listed at $3,900,000. Uh oh. Your Mama hopes Mister Brazill is still receiving some big fat residual checks to cover his recent real estate losses.

4.
Once upon a time funny ladee Brett Butler, a deep voiced southern blond with a reputation for being a wee bit difficult to work, had a television show of her own called Grace Under Fire that ran for five reasonably successful seasons in the mid-1990s. Back in 1994, when the TV money was rolling in like a tidal wave, Miz Butler went out and bought herself a celebrity style house on Woodrow Wilson Drive in the hills high above Hollywood for an undisclosed amount of money.

Fast forward to April of 2008 when Miz Butler listed her 3 bedroom, 4 bathroom and 3,314 square foot house with swimming pool, guest house, three fireplaces and sweeping city and Hollywood sign views with an asking price of $2,347,000. After several price chops and at least one deal that fell out of escrow, the property has finally sold for the nice round number of $2,000,000.

We don't have a clue where the once rehabbed and twice dee-vorced Miz Butler is headed, but Your Mama would not be surprised to hear that she's bee lining it back her native Alabama where two millions clams goes a long way in the in the real estate game.

5.
It certainly didn't take long for pulchritudinous Paul Bettany and Oscar winning actress Jennifer Connelly to unload their Brooklyn townhouse. According to the online listing, the 5,276 square foot Golden Age limestone mansion has already gone to contract and the rumor sweeping up and down Park Slope's 7th Avenue is that it's being sold for very close to the $8,500,000 asking price. The extremely successful but low key couple served as the de facto poster children for the Brooklyn real estate renaissance having scooped up their speck-tack-u-lar Prospect Park West mansion with 9 bedrooms and 3.5 bathrooms in August of 2003 for $3,700,000.

All rumors and reports say that Miz Connelly and Mister Bettany have purchased a $7,000,000 (approx.) loft in the hideously expensive and tragically trendy celebrity and Wall Street enclave of TriBeCa. At least Brooklyn still has Oscar nominated Michelle Williams, one of the gays from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, and of course the newly anointed king and queen of Brooklyn based celebrities Maggie Gyllenhaal and Peter Sarsgaard. For now.

Could this mark the beginning of the end of the Brooklyn or bust trend of the last 5 or 8 years? There isn't anything wrong with living in Brooklyn. In fact there are many and multiple reasons why it's a perfectly lovely place to reside. However, many die-hard Manhattanites moved to the borough of Brooklyn to escape the high cost of living in Manhattan and now that it's nearly as expensive to shack up in Park Slope, will they still suffer the 40 minute subway ride?

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Denise Richards Is On the Move...Again

SELLER: Denise Richards
LOCATION: Long Valley Drive, Hidden Hills, CA
PRICE: $3,999,999 (reduced from $4,250,000)
SIZE: 5,651 square feet, 5 bedrooms, 7 bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Here we go again. Bond gurl, boobie baring Playboy model, celebrity ex-wife, tabloid train wreck and newly minted reality television star Denise Richards is on the move. Again. Oh lawhd children, this ladee is about as real estate fickle as they come. In fact, she's becoming a real Ellen Degeneres with her real estate whirligig, never settling in for more than a year or two before moving on to new digs. Let's have a little recap of Miss Richards recent real estate transactions, just in case anyone cares.

In May of 2005, after fleeing the Encino estate she shared with her obscenely rich, prostie luvin' and (allegedly) porn obsessed huzband Charlie Sheen, she forked over $3,995,000 for house on Middle Fork Road in a gated Westlake Village community. Miss Richards' new crib sat just a stone's throw from her one time BFF and current arch enemy Heather Locklear. However, once Miss Richards started dating Miss Locklear's estranged huzband Richie Sambora, she unloaded that house lickety-split (for $4,100,000) and high-tailed it over to Hidden Hills, another swank and celebrity friendly guard gated community in suburban Los Angeles where in May of 2006 she purchased a house on Long Valley Road for $4,000,000. After owning the 5,188 square foot ranchette for less than one year, the peripatetic gossip glossy favorite flipped it back on the market at $4,495,000 where it sat until she karate chopped the asking price to just under three point eight million smackers. Property records (and reports) show that in late 2007 she finally sold the place for $3,800,000.

But children, even before she sold the above mentioned house on Long Valley Road, the sometimes funny and often foul mouthed Miss Richards purchased another horse friendly house on Long Valley Road. In June of 2007 she forked over $4,395,000 for the 1.15 acre property across the street which property records and listing information indicates measures 5,651 square feet with 5 bedrooms and 7 bathrooms. And now, just one year later she's listed the house at $4,250,000, which even a moe-ron can see is less than she paid for the estate just one year ago. It's been well reported that Miss Richards hauls in boo-coo bucks from her ex-huzband, but can bee-hawtcha really afford to loose half a million dollars in her real estate transactions over the last few years? Considering single mother of two is reported to have a sliver of multi-million dollar back end pie from Mister Sheen's screamingly successful sit-com Two and a Half Men, Your Mama imagines she can.

Anyhoo, current listing information does not currently show pictures of the interior. However iffin the children have any interest in viewing the inviting foyer, grand chef's kitchen with marble counters and custom cabinetry, the luxurious master bedroom with retreat and sumptuous master bath with island spa tub, the gym, office and/or backyard swimming pool and spa, one need only TiVo her show on the E! channel.

Your Mama doesn't have a clue where Miss Richards will be moving next, but we fully expect that her house hunt will be filmed for her television program and printed up in all the gossip glossies. Because let's face it children, she may not be a contender for an Academy Award or an Emmy, but she makes for good tabloid reading. Admit it, she does.

photos: Pacific Coast News

Katherine Heigl Selling Starter Home

Okay children, Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter have finally winged our way back home. We're jet lagged and a wee bit hung over from one too many complimentary gin and tonics on the plane, but we're gonna do the best we can on limited brain resources today starting with some old news.

SELLER: Kathering Heigl
LOCATION: Parva Avenue, Los Angeles, CA
PRICE: $1,750,000 (list)
SIZE: 2,369 square feet, 3 bedrooms, 2.5 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Celebrity owned redone contemporary w/ open floor plan. Stunning walls of glass to view city from downtown to ocean. Professionally designed dream kitchen w/ SubZero, center island, and granite counter tops. Large master w/ French doors to city view balcony. Sensational master bath w/ huge stone steam shower. Many upgrades such as hardwood floors, dual zone a/c, recessed lights. Entertainers yard w/ room for pool.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: According to the dee-voon Miz Ann Brenoff at the Los Angeles Times, getting a little big for her britches boob-toober turned film star Katherine Heigl (27 Dresses, Knocked Up) has listed her "starter house" on twisty turny Parva Avenue in Los Angeles' Los Feliz neighborhood. Property records show the cancer stick luving Grey's Anatomy actress purchased the 3 bedroom and 2.5 bathroom house in April of 2006 when she forked over $1,500,000 for the the frustration and annoyance of trying to squeeze her giant red Range Rover Sport into that standard sized garage.

Your Mama's bejeweled abacus tells us that with the current asking price of $1,750,000 Miss Heigl will barely make any money on this property, but given that she's currently one of the most in demand actresses in Hollywood, that's probably not a major concern of hers.

The 2,369 square foot house has clearly been staged to within an inch of livability so we won't bother to comment on the oh so common orchids, the sad artwork or the banal and exuberantly beige day-core. Listing information shows that the house includes an open floor plan, all wood floors (that parquet shit makes Your Mama woozy), long and impressive views over the city that worships at Miss Heigl's well shod feet, a master bedroom with a view balcony and steam shower (perfect for releasing all the tobacco toxins), and a kitchen that has been done over by a real live kitchen design professional and features granite counter tops and top grade appliances.

This modestly sized quasi-Mediterranean crib was a reasonable real estate purchase at the time considering Miss Heigl had yet to become the belle of the Hollywood ball when she snapped this place up. However, as soon as the recently married Miss Heigl hit it big on the big screen, she went house hunting again. Property records show that in September of 2007, flush with movie money and in possession of a newly won Emmy for her role on Grey's Anatomy, Miss Heigl plunked down $2,550,000 for a 3,960 square foot house with 4 bedrooms and 3.5 bathrooms that sits less than a mile from the Parva Street property she has on the market.

Your Mama imagines that as Miss Heigl's star rises so will the price of her real estate. The young ladee clearly likes living in Los Feliz, but if we had to predict, we'd look for her next move to be to a proper estate with a long, gated celebrity style driveway and more terlits than there are days in the week. In the meantime, Your Mama wishes Miss Heigl a happy home and a little more tact in dealing with her bosses at ABC.